This is a 200+ page magazine (unfinished) of interior design colour palettes I had intended for girls who are not home-makers. It was tremendously disappointing to receive and I’ve let go of the idea. I’ve had to let go of and really I’ve learned to accept that people don’t realise that if it happens to me, it is going to happen to you. It might take twenty years, you might learn a lot about coping, from me, but it is going to happen to you.

If you are lucky enough to know what your dreams are, good, hold onto that. But you won’t live your dreams, until I live mine. I won’t live my dreams until the women who’ve been around for longer than I have, live theirs. Wave goodbye to your dreams is how I would advise you to cope with what you’ve done to me.

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BRIGHTON SKETCHBOOK| This book is a years worth of what I’ve been upto. It is incomplete.

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The image above is a lot of fun. Heath Ledger told me to ‘pick Jenova‘ – I wanted to be Aerith ever since I saw her in FFVII.

These shapes formed in these objects without any influence from me. Can you see the eye and teeth in the salt jar? I have big versions. Can you see a purple figure in a top I was tie-dying, grinning?

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Here is a picture I drew in my sketchbook, shortly before I befriended a dancing-bird I found on the street. I called her Killi. She is very naughty.

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I do believe animals can be mind controlled if their person is stalked.

My animas are how I replace family. When I grew up, I didn’t run away from home, because I had dogs who loved me and whom I loved in return. They are/were never just ‘dogs’, but family. If I did not have my dogs, I would be nothing and dead. People cannot exist without being loved by something.

The sad thing about being #1 in the Illuminati is that if it happens to me, be certain that it shall happen to you.

Do not compete for that position. Don’t debate it either, it’s hell.
If someone asks for it, I say “okay” and they come back soon enough on the brink of insanity, with terrible depression and you’ll feel to vomit too and that is what you pay for defending heroin addicts that fed their children heroin-breastmilk and ran off with a copy of my body because they learned through time travel that I had not consented to that they were going to die.

I’ve been making a toy for almost a year. You don’t really know, reader, unless you do, how much work it takes to create something. It takes a lifetime of seeing things – watching films, visiting people’s homes, dreaming and imagining: to realise and determine what it is that you like, as a person.

To create this particular toy: I dressed up to visit a local shop I love very much, I had to wait for months, for my unemployment benefits. I selected threads and needles and pins especially for the work I had in mind. I selected filler.

Of my old “friends”: they are unchanging people I find unforgivable

a psychiatrist my mother and father paid for: told my mother, once, that one’s problems follow them.

He said “geography isn’t the issue”, indicating that you have to resolve your personal problems because they will recur. There was this song, I liked, that a one night stand sent me by a band called mewithoutyou, and the lead singer said something like “you think I don’t mean what I say? Well I mean every word that I say”

and if you do not think that is justified, that is well within your right to be wrong.

I assure you it is justified

Published by KARINITA

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