Just um. Some notes.

Art Class for clever people

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I’m going to do a colour chart for the people that woke up one day and decided they were interested in fashion design or clothes. Everyone uses clothes to express themselves but that does not mean you are interested in or that you understand ‘fashion’.

Do you want to know something? When I was studying at LCF Peaches Geldof (died on the seventh of April I think, got buried at Saint Mary Magdalene’s church after all but announcing herself as Jewish, was an O.T.O initiate and ruined what could have been the most beautiful secret society that puts love before anything. And actually for a person whose favourite art and movies are always either about love or killing things –

it was deeply insulting. People broke up with me because they were weirded out by how intense I am. If I was not intense I would be as boring as YOU. There was nothing loving about that woman.) wrote a style article about ‘capsule wardrobes’ and that made me not ice her. And I saw her wearing frilly socks that I’d obsessed about having but could never see in shoppes. At that point in my life it was that easy for me to love someone.

FYI I’m Ewan’s character. A boyfriend once gave me a special edition of this movie for my birthday. It was the only present I got on that birthday and it was the happiest day in the world for me for years.

this is a peach. I found the image on google.

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People keep rushing to mourn her by labelling colour palettes ‘peach’. I have no idea where they managed to come to any kind of conclusion that the colour that is being marketed as ‘peach’ could be given such a name. It makes no sense. I’ve highlighted the colour that people think is peach – sort of – but thats about it. Stop pretending that NUDE PINK shades are “peach”. GO BACK TO SCHOOL. YOU NEED TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL. STOP COMPETING WITH PEOPLE WHO HAVE STUDIED ALL OF THEIR LIVES. WHO HAVE BEEN BROUGHT UP BY ACADEMICS OR PEOPLE WHO HAVE SERVED GOVERNMENTS FOR GENERATIONS OVER. IT’LL WORK FOR A BIT BUT YOU’LL END UP MAKING A MESS. If your education stopped at sixteen to eighteen years old – your brain is stuck there because that’s when you stopped using it.

Here is why I never tried to get a career as an actor. Literally scenes like this. I’m sure you’re all above ‘dance movies’ but in a moment I will tell you why that’s stupid.

This is a scene about a really fun weekend dance class and is why I never thought I was good enough to act. Apart from the level of confidence it takes and the fact that you have to have a good memory – and I don’t – I was under the impression that if you wanted a career in the performing arts you had to be able to DO – EVERYTHING.


Can I remind you of this?

These are some of our cadets. You want to pretend that ALL THREE of these people aren’t on steroids?

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This is an actors appearing in a movie I rented from Blockbusters that never hit the cinema.

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Which one would you cower to the ground from if they were about to kick you in the head? Our boiz 3 versus 1 – or this one 1 versus 1 ^

I was insecure because I could sing notes but I couldn’t READ them. That’s ONE OF THE REASONS I didn’t apply to study at RADA – the real reason I still won’t is ‘mayhem’ scenes. RADA is the only drama school anyone should take seriously.  Lamda is great too – for people that want to be in classical theatre. Not in movies.

I wanted to be in action movies, military movies and thrillers. I actually wanted to play these characters –

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kirika

aeris-ffviiart

ALL MY LIFE.

Iunno why but I really resonated with their stories. WINK WINK.

When I was about thirteen I saw the Illuminati referenced in an Angelina Jolie movie. I was taken by the relics, the empowered female, the kind of stuff that normal people are absolutely terrified by or otherwise call you ‘weird’ for valuing.

I told my mother that night that I wanted to be in the Illuminati. She took me to my “father’s” weird kitchen cabinet and took out a wine and showed me that it was from a vineyard owned by the Illuminati.

Years later a woman representing the “people of the light” told me that I wouldn’t be a famous actor, that I’d get lots of plastic surgery and I was OKAY WITH IT because she told me that I’d marry my soulmate. I was OKAY with not having ANY OF MY DREAMS because I’d be with a person I was in love with.

YEARS LATER AND THIS MORPHS INTO THIS

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and I realise that OTO teaches people how to leave their bodies. She was dating a guy whose music she didn’t like and using her instagram to take the piss of me. She was the only ‘celebrity’ account I was following.

If you know you know but if you don’t –

WHAT THE FUCKING HELL CAN THESE CELEBRITIES DO? APART FROM GET STUPID PEOPLE TO SPEND MONEY ON STUPID SHIT?

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FYI – I liked her for a bit, too. I was on mind altering drugs. Amongst their side effects were parkinsonism. That thing elderly people get.

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What is your excuse?

 

 

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