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back when girls thought applying make up meant wearing eyeliner.

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She likes Ninja swords not samurai swords
She likes charcoal
She wants to be a mercenary
She cares a lot about the diamond trade
She will be polite if you waste her time but also you won’t forget it
She doesn’t currently exist technically
And also human ideals and relationships around the idea of family are lies so she’s not coming here to be someone’s ‘daughter’ or ‘little girl’ or to be called a ‘good girl’ and the fact that humans still need to label each other those things is indicative of a person who thinks love involves having sex with people. She is not one of those people but has the appropriate pity for people who are those people.

Her babysitters are all the league of legends boys currently over 25, especially the unattractive ones. If you leave the house looking a mess you’re not hanging out with her. If you are hanging out with her you will feel weird if you try to leave the house looking bad – but also you’ll go up and be immediately drawn to a WAY better outfit. You won’t start obsessing about your physical appearance – just about how bad you may or may not look. It’s specific and if you get anything else it’s someone lying. I mean you know what she’s like. We don’t hang out.

This is her cousin Hope’s favourite song cos it has her name in it and also as much as I loathe my sister – and I do entirely – she is a really, really good dancer and so you know that for however pitiful (im joking) her child might be – however many overpriced silk bowties might be sitting in his room  – he’ll be a great dancer


the men at the end are all of blood’s boyfriends who need protections

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