you’re the Mc Q U E E N | I’m the Mc K I N G (J’amie related joke)

When I had my spiritual awakening, I was told that my twin had committed suicide.
At the time, he actually told me he was going to do it.

I used to listen to this a lot in my late teens

And in my earlier teens I listened to this


He said he’d come back and we’d be together but that it wouldn’t ever be how it was supposed to (Then I got a new twin and he was a piece of shit, I taught him about the butterfly effect and the importance of feeling – we lived out our karma in a few years sort of – and I got given a new one)

So. Imagine how it is for Willow and Jaden (Kwami) being twinflames and brother and sister.

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Sometimes your “the one” is your kid. Sometimes your “the one” is your bestfriend from a million years ago (he wouldn’t date me because I was ‘too young’ – which is code for I ‘needed lip injections’ and my parents refused to give me cash to buy nice things because they were spending so much money on my sister) will never speak to you again’s kid that hasn’t been born yet, can time travel and occupy people – whether it’s for fun times, for ruining lives or controlling her future boyfriends. She’s really, really autistic.

Time isn’t linear -_-

Especially not for people who do/have done drugs


You need to watch this

I was at London College of Fashion when he died.

I did these illustrations around and slightly before that time.

“Shall we dance” is a lyric from “the King and I” also no one should dance wearing a dress like this. this is a dress for delicately stumbling around drunkenly, making parties/hallways look beautiful.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QgVPnWmUqd4

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I find it amusing that she’s wearing flats but theres an invisible heel beside her foot. I do not look good in flats.
(Things you didn’t know – I’m a better dancer than you. Unless I’m being occupied by aliens or kids from the future etc. Levi is a better dancer than me though, but don’t tell anyone – there’s a really competitive girl he likes that dances and he’s got a plan to bust it out.)

Also I do not dance with people. I only dance alone. thx.

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After I quit London College of Fashion, soon after McQueen had died – I met two guys, and I was quite in love with both of them. One of them read the tattoo on my arm (A Shakespeare quote that says “These Violent Delights” – but he read it as “These Vitamin Donuts”)
I had gotten the tattoo after a break up, it’s a Shakespeare quote about falling in love too soon. It also appears in a Stephanie Meyer novel. But it was most notable in this song

I had unprotected sex with both of these guys within a very short timeframe and ended up pregnant. It takes at least three to get pregnant.
My only friend at the time joked that the baby was an “alien”. I told one of the guys I’d had sex with about it and he called it “Skree” – like the noise Alien makes.

I did this before that conversation.
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This is a scribble I did over Lily Cole. I should really scan the full pages at some point.

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I did this years later at Film School. I called it “Gustav Klimt’s less attractive European sex slave cousin, four times removed” Which wasn’t a reflection of my feelings about my illustration, more just me putting myself down because who can really compare to a Klimt illustration? I actually think she’s quite pretty.

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I think this style of drippy watercolour is quite inspired by Marilyn Manson’s work. Years after I did these I came across a music video that had the pink haired girl in it. Prettier in person of course. I assume, I mean I never actually saw her in person

Sorry if I sound bitter, I spent about ten years of my life being obsessed with him and when I finally hung out with him he couldn’t even bother verbally telling me I had a splotch of red fake blood on my nose and I got kind of pissed off afterwards because I realised I couldn’t trust him or his bitchtroll sister.

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I was pursuing her ex boyfriend. He is so out of my league.

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And then some time later I did this, in 7A West Street – the flat that appeared in lots of art before I ever moved in – before I died. It’s funny – I said “this flat (and the furniture in my bedroom is going to be worth a fortune“) My Pleidian guide authored a pretty poetic version of the story in Genesis trying to explain how the Planet happened on a chest of drawers.
Of course it’s probably all been trashed. haha.

I love her almond up eyes

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I watched Chocolat and started illustrating stuff. I later realised theres a “Chocolat” poster in “Blood the Last Vampire” – an anime that was made for me. The first time I got pregnant was around about the same time I first watched it.

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I had my spiritual awakening in a flat that looked terrifyingly similar to the apartment in Silent Hill 4 – I spent the last summer with my first real boyfriend alternating between naps, Silent Hill 4 and Harvest Moon. I feel like McQueen must’ve been watching me play, because it’s so obvious his shows were inspired by Silent Hill and the GodsGirls Girls-only forums.


Everyone’s in there


I keep telling people that my future kids are fragments of me that have been murdered – and that they’re coming back to tell the truth. You might be us, you might project onto us, we’re better rolemodels than … oh iunno. you know.


When I was super high, YEARS AGO – Levi wrote >> this << for me and a few other people. Like if it’s for you or a fragment of you, you’ll know

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